Having The Confidence

I've blogged before about how frustrating it is to write, and write, and write and never see it go anywhere. About how my drafts kept stalling out halfway through, and Shiny New Idea Syndrome took over and pulled me in another direction.

This isn't going to be about that. Because I've kicked Shiny New Idea Syndrome in the bottom.

My manuscript is done. It's polished. It's in the hands of some final beta readers and I'm itching with a mixture of impatience and worry at the thought of querying. I have everything an agent could ask for: query, synopsis, etc. Everything is done, and all that's left is getting things back from my beta reads and actually querying.

That's where needing the confidence comes in. I'm genuinely terrified every time I share my work, even with my trusted group of CP's (who are the single best group of ladies on the planet, and definitely shouldn't be nerve inducing.) And I'm nine or ten times more terrified to share it with actual industry professionals. I don't know if it's a lack of confidence in myself, or my book, or my ability to make it through this without going COMPLETELY GREY. But it sucks. It sucks worrying that what you've written isn't good enough to impress the way it must in order to get published.

So this week, and next, I'm working on my confidence. And my New Years resolution will be to keep working, and becoming the strongest writer that I can possibly be. This is my dream. I just need the confidence to make it happen.

Happy Holidays everyone. <3 p="">

Megan